Search for the lost glory!

Life, it seems is a journey filled with colors bold. I am told without these colors the journey is incomplete.

The journey started with a cry to mark the presence in the world, moments then filled with smiles looking at the stars, wanting to play with the moon, mumbles of unknown words with unidentified meaning while the heart yearned for nothing, with confidence abundant, as the familiarity set of known and unknown the days passed while the moments spread joy around for people, it expected nothing in return.

There were bright sunny days, some cloudy days while a few dull days nothing but the routine set it, heart which once spread happiness, bliss and love; now longer spread these through the presences- it felt!

Deep down in the heart still the moments of bliss is fresh and  confined to the space, while it loves, adores, respects through all these shades of life , it makes every attempt to share the shades with the known, unknown of human race.

It secretly cries while it makes a colossal attempt not to share with the world known the reason for those warm tears, those it is told are not meant to be showcased to the world.

It questions the nature “ Why Me always?” While it seeks a response, it gets none.

Deep down all it yearns is unconditional love and happiness, it cries out aloud to the nature “when I came to your world, I spread happiness, love and bliss, I brought instant smiles on all those charming faces which looked at me, Where has all this gone?”  Can you please return them to me?

With a hope to get lost glory it beats at a normal pace thud-thud-dud-dud...

Random Thoughts

I thought hard today, the harder I thought pleasant things filled the flow of thoughts.

Life-

The Past was beautiful

Present an experience of reality

Future a wonderful dream I would love to experience over and over ………

I am told that angels are not fantasy and they exist in real, they come as a passing cloud spread their charm and elegance and off they disappear. I experienced the charm, you appeared spread the divine message showed me the path of bliss…

I do not know how I met you in this journey of life, nor do I know the why’s! All I know is you appeared like a flash in the starry sky, made this life a beautiful journey to pass, an experience to cherish, taught me the art of hope, filled these eyes with wonderful dreams to accomplish and to see through the world!

You have always been there for me

You respect me, my ideas, my thoughts!

You adore me as an individual

You trust in me and my abilities

You pamper me like a child,

You protect me like a mother

You care for me as a friend

You are my pillar of support, my ray of hope, my confidant.

Life is a complete journey!

The deep-rooted secret “ Angel- Really?” is still unanswered. Yet the experience teaches me not to question the nature! For it is said "all that happens, is for good! ". I now know all that is coming is for good to build a beautiful tomorrow from all those wonderful dreams these eyes have just seen.

An Experience ... It Was!

Day dawned with surprises which I least expected even in the rarest of my nightmares.

As I stepped in for work the waters that were smooth for a while had become turbulent, as I set my pace pacifying the waters of change, the day had long passed noon and the evening sun was happily setting in the west with a ting of mockery on me!

“ Jashne – E- Bahaara ….” A ring tone for a while took me unguarded by surprise, as I thought the call must be from amma to pick up a some grocery on my way was dulled with Minal’s( My sister) photo on the flash screen. With random thoughts for the reason of the call I quipped “ hello! Tell me if its urgent, I am too busy @ work”.
I was taken aback by the panic stricken voice on the other end “Jini” it went...While my heart pounded hard to get to the core of the matter with shaky voice she added “Can you tell me the our vehicle number” As I went blank for second wondering why I was posed with such a weird question of all while I answered her and gave her the details I expected a reasonable justification for the question. As my sister explained the situation I was rather stunned at the turn of the events. My sister had parked my 2 yr old Scooty Pep in parking area by the time she returned from her appointment of 15 mins, the bike was gone…..
With weird random thoughts gushing in I asked her to relax and check if the vehicle has been taken by the cops for any parking violation. She immediately quipped “ No, I have checked that”
Well this was something to worry about. Just as the worry was setting in all hurry. It struck to me the number I gave her was of my old scooty! Hmm

“Ranj, I think you should learn the new number of your vehicle. You never know when you need it. I am surprised you can’t remember this when you can remember all silly things in life” Echoed from the memories of what my friend had said when I first showed the new bike a month after its purchase in Jan 07. Well the echo now seemed to be instant mockery on my memory power for which I have always been complemented for.

Bah "how can I forget the registration number? "

As I dialed home to get the details ,amma’s ability to digest the fact took longer then I expected while I convinced her daughters were safe and sound. She broke yet another surprise. “Do you know what? There are no original documents in the folder! She exclaimed. Just the Riders Manual and the original copy of the Purchase Bill” Geeks as I screeched Realization from within on how fool hardy I am, hammered the moment.

We managed to fish the number from the Purchase bill, with all of my uncles reassuring me not to worry and keep my cool,I hurriedly rushed from the office building not to miss the shuttle back in all the commotion that had filled the day. As I took my seat I said to myself “Now be done with this, enough is enough! I put the music with a deliberate attempt to rejuvenate the long lost peace of the day!

Generating good revenues to the Airtel’s and Vodofone’s of the world. With marginal contribution to BSNL’s also, the course of action was being discussed over the mobile networks. As one uncle said “First File the FIR no matter what immediately! ” My active thought process was “Immediately??? How can I?? I am still on bus more importantly I am not driving it, for heaven sake its peak hour traffic how can I do it immediately?”
While I checked again to ascertain if I heard right “Yes” came the prompt response. “I will try “I said knowing it cannot happen immediately!

I dashed home picked up the leftovers of documents, dashed out rushing to the police station where my sister had been waiting for over an hour with all the gyan coming from the cops on the do’ and don’ts (Gyan when given free of cost can be very frustrating) As she tried to smile warily at me, I tried to return back a assuring smile “Don’t worry” while it meant, "If Its gone, Its Is gone! No point thinking about it”

Thanks to the media, my assumptions on the cops were rather strong and wrong. I thought they would be people all together from an alien planet with no concern for kindness. I thought hard how to tackle the situation and the aliens, yet another surprise lay in store. Thankfully, good one for its kind in the day.
The cops who were at the station were courteous and kind enough to patiently listen to the incident. While they assured they would trace the vehicle they were amicable and friendly. This created a sense of warmth and security in me while also assuring me that they would seriously launch a search for this lost vehicle.
As they completed the formalities in just an hour, a sense of respect for them had taken its root in me.
As promised they traced my lost vehicle and safely handed that to me.

A good civilian also couriered the orginal documents found in some construction Site ( I thank Mr Yogesh M who took all pains to courier the documents amidst his busy schedule)
While I am bustling with other formalities to set the gadi back to normal shape. Here I share some key insights and learnings from this experience of mine

Key learning this particular day had in store for me are far too many,

*Never keep your original documents in the vehicle no matter what it takes!
*Never lose your cool, ( This is real test for stress, This can be used for Best Manager event if any)
*Tune the mind to senses and presence of mind is very important .
*Always remember to remember the Vehicle number (Thanks to those mocking moments from the memories, I now know why I was asked to remember the Registration number)
*Never take your friends lightly! (They know you better than yourself)
*All the more never Assume (cops are also of the same human race as ours, respect them and they will respect you)
*Beware there are thieves around!

* Trust in god, If its meant to be yours it will be yours anyways!

Life a Perfect Bliss @ MPBIM

Some moments though have long passed in the sail of time still remain immortal in the depth of heart and soul. Yea, these memories bring instant smile on the radiant face.
Those were the days when Fun was a part and parcel of Academic Life.

As I recall the first semester , It dates back to the day I entered the college with the students waiting for the Art of Living session, I was looking for at least one familiar face in the crowd and how happy I was to find Deepika there amidst a group of girls when she first introduced me to the rest. As I stood trying to understand what the girls were discussing, Ranjani, Called out yet another familiar voice, and apparently he turned out to be my friend from last school, college and now even the masters I wondered??!! Well a little dazed little surprised we spoke a few nice words. Little did I know many students had already noticed me in the Pink /Purple Salwar and had already come to know me by name! And instantly clicked as friends .From then there has been no looking back.

A small group of 60 odd students in the orientation bubbling with energy, bustling all along the day was something which I seem to miss a lot. There were days when we made presentations on the weird topics of the earth, when we danced to the tunes of sounds n silence, while we gelled together as one family, dropping all our inhibitions while embracing the warmth of togetherness, little did I realize the actual course had started.

How fast the Semester passed introducing me to totally new field of management. As I tried hard to cope up with the syllabus flipping the pages of OB text, understanding what Eco’s and Nomo’s meant, mugging the Accounting Principles Uff !!that drained me out completely. How I had silently cried when my first presentation on Accounting Principles -13 was a major flop while I still tried to sit straight and managed to put a brave face while reminding myself that there was also a second chance. As the internals approached how the efforts had doubled just to stay on in the race which I knew nothing of! When the D day came as we all worked through the day and night for the exams, how I had cried on the day of economics paper for my mind had blacked out, how supportive my friends were to help me revive the lost memory and how grateful I am to them. To this day I cannot forget the day I gave the Economics paper!

The little gossips we used to have during lunch breaks, the round table lunch time discussions on failure of CANCUN summit, The TRAI Regulations, the daily stock market watch, news updated from sharekhan.com, the snippets and reviews from ET (Economic Times) and preparations for Business quizzes and Presentations would fill the day with little surprises here and there. As we worked on different case studies from the world of corporate while stretching our thinking ability to think “Out of the Box” finally ending our day with a small dose of Who Moved My Cheese, of Fish

Visits to Kanija Bhavan Canteen for lunch, how a friend of mine freaked out “Do you really come here for lunch?” ( Expression on the face was worth a million $, I wish i had a insatant Cam) on seeing the famous Garage Canteen of Kanjia Bhavan as we stepped in for a dose of strong coffee is something I cherish to this day.

The excitement of results from I sem , How Swami Rao sir had verbally announced the results as Pass… Pass… Fail… Pass …kept my heart pounding with anticipation to hear Pass called against my name sounding heavily like thump thump.. thud thud! The process which was so new to me once which I gradually got used with passing months!

My dream to participate in at least one Management Fest while I shared this with none for all the reticence I carried in the depth of heart and the day it was realized with Esperanto – a Bangalore University fest with combined effort of Manu (Manasa) and me just to make to the second level while we grappled in the first level and the beaming faces of both as we made to the Final Level. With the Case Study Presentation in the Finals and how both of us had stretched out limits just to put up 7 slides of the 40 page case on the night before the Presentation and how dispirited we were to know that ours was the only presentation of 7 slides while we competed with our own seniors and top colleges who had more to share, with all dismayed hopes of winning the event we sat for the final verdict. As Hareesh Bijjoor addressed and started the Award ceremony both of us were lost in our thoughts on how two days had passed and just as we were realizing the abundance of good surprises in store our results were announced. How foolishly each of us forgot and ignored our own names till our team finally patted us hard and pushed us on the dais to collect our Award! Those were the shining and glowing moments for both Manu and me to cherish all through.

As we kept moving ahead from one fest to another while adding many such colorful feathers to our hat.
We prepared hard for the Second year with Major courses setting in while the momentum on course front diluted, accustomed to life of stress with clear evidence in presentation preparation time which had reduced from 1 Week to 1 hr before presentation was strong indication of us mastering the tricks in MBA!

Days rolled… one sem after another with last minute exam preparations and exchange of sms’s on most expected questions. With late night calls to friends “Hey, I am done with this chapter, are you through too?” While each exam came in and went the moments remained the same

While we managed the interns, apprehension on question posed by the external in Viva Voce ruled us for a while.
Our preparations to host Paradigm, while we formed committees and teams with ongoing meetings and updates for planning event, remind us how happy we were as a family. The feeling of oneness and success of the event was vibrant in the air.

As we moved to fourth sem, with placement pressures setting in while I tried to cope up with research projects and manage majors while I still had my share of fun with usual lunches in Kanija or the college canteen. Terrace garden chit chats and exchange of forwards, little fights and compromises, crackling laughter and dazzling days filled my life.

A day dawned and I realized that Golden days I enjoyed had already become a golden era.
The two years of my life had suddenly come to an abrupt end, without any fore warning.
The days have sailed past over four years, but the memories still live fresh
Each passing day I think of the golden era, while each passing day I shed a tear here and there just to remind myself on what a wonderful life enjoyed.
With hope setting for passing more such days with the all the lovely people who made my life so vibrant and clourful ……….

I wish life had a rewind button that I would want to replay Aug 2003- Aug 2005……….

Friends Of Autumn

Forwards are one of the best way to stay together and also a good pill for distress! On a fine Monday morning ,among heap of official mails to action in one corner of the mail box was a mail from my best friend who was completely lost in the bounds of time..... The mail had a little poem, and it read

I was thinking of old friends today
And how many of them have slipped away.
Moved, got married, or stopped calling so much,
Found new friends, got busy, and just lost touch.
It reminded me of falling leaves.
Every autumn the leaves fall from the trees.
Some stay longer than others,
but eventually - Each leaf must fall, I’m told,
Leaving the tree alone to face the cold.
Why is it that in the time of utmost need
The leaves would seek to leave the tree?
And when we need our friends around
We look and they can not be found?
Of course these friendships come and go
And in the spring new leaves will grow.
But I prefer autumn friends of old
With crackling laughter and colors bold.
It saddens me now I must admit
How somehow, someway,
I did forget Laughing with old friends of mine
During summers when the sun would shine.
And then I thought of you.
That one stubborn leaf that won’t let go.
That clings despite the winds that blow.
Fighting ice, and snow, and winter’s stings
Hanging on right through till spring.
So I guess that’s what you are to me -
The very last leaf to leave the tree.
I know it seems silly, but it’s true.
When I see that last leaf…
…I think of you.

With series of emotions running in me, I called my friend while making a collosal attempt to control my swelling eyes , Just managed to say " Thanks"

I Spy ( Hide and Seek, Kanna Muchale)

Kanna Muche Kade Gude Uppina Moote Orle Hoyothu, Namma Hakki Nimma Hakki Bitte Bitte.....

I Spy ?? How many times have I played this game as little girl with the neighbour's kid ........

While returning from our very own Cauveri theater ( which Veena would happily agree for calling it very own, as this is our hot spot hangout right from college days just to catch the glimpse of Bollywood badshaas in there Hit-Flop ventures!) we decided to drop in Chits new home , as we went in admired her new home and compared with Veena old house and stepped out to walk back home we saw a bunch of kids must be in the age group of 10- 14 yrs playing one of the oldest most popular outdoor game I SPY as its called. Immediate reaction from three of us was " Yesthu dina agide alve navu Ice pice addi?"- ( Hasn't it be so long since we played I Spy ?)

Ahhh well yes probably this is the first time in many years that I saw kids play the outdoor game in locality where I stay , I wonder what technology has done to the generations to come by? glued to Internet, TV and Video Games that most kids today would prefer a social network on Orkut / Facebook ( may be with Fake Age) or chat on Gtalk with classmates or the good old Video game to spend their leisure.

Gone are the days when we rushed back from school , eagerly waited for vacations to begin just to play with the kids in the neighbourhood the most popular games I Spy, Lagori, Kalla Police, Kunte Balle (played with box drawn on the land, while the player called "Rightaa ?"( Is it Right/Correct ?) School-School ,Cricket,Badminton and the list never ends.

When the rain disrupted our normal schedules we would all scream in chorus the old little jingle " Rain Rain Go Away...." to our disappointment if the rains didn't stop our last resort to stay together was assemble in a house with a huge court yard and start playing LIDO, Scramble, Snake and Ladder yes the option were many....

As the kids went on vacation to visit the grandparents and relatives when we were just a handful of kids we would sit with my granny to play the pagade ( believe me this is one best way to learn Math with all addition, subtraction multiplication... not to mention the strategy!), gulli mane and more such things.

What has become to all these games? Have we all forgotten our childhood so fast? are we so lost in the appreciating the software and technology that these little fun we had as children are close to extinction ?Don't we want the Gen Y to also enjoy the same childhood our parents once gave us?

Pondering with all these thoughts and with feeling of nostalgia setting in ....

Closing remark Next venture of RVSCAN is to play Kanne Muche Kade Gude... I hope the day is not too far!

As I Tread Past The Memory Lane

> 2009 II---------->>Rewind>> --------->Play>

I was thinking of my School days today, how fast the once present is now a past. Those were the moments of colors bold when amma would whisk me away from bed to get me set for a every new day in school, with huge sack on my back waiting for the Van uncle to pick me, the morning assembly in school seeking the blessings of the almighty and as I sang in chorus “Guru Brahma Guru Vishno Gurur Devo Maheshwara….. “ As I dashed to the class soon after the morning assembly just to escape the eyes of the PT Master ready to catch his prey for unpolished shoes. Appa’s time to polish the shoe in the morning were all in vain as they bore traces leg fights I had with the bunch of kids in the School Van.

As I sat in the class learning English, solving the profit and loss problems, trying to understand the difference between a solar eclipse and lunar eclipse, the umbra and the penumbra, always wondering how Deccan plateau and Peninsular India made sense? Waiting eagerly for the Physical Education training to stay fit and do some warm ups.

Free periods due to teachers absence compensated time to catch up with the friends of mine and chit chat on latest crushes the girls had and have most important discussion of the day “what makes Aamir look so adorable in Joo Jeetha Wohi Sikkandar”?.

As the Art and Craft sessions approached I always wondered why girls should do all the stitching while boys happily escaped with reading those books and comics in the library. While I turned green with the “J” attitude and softer side of me yearning to set hands on those Nancy Drews , Hardy Boys, Tintin and Astrix while the boys enjoyed the break from monotony . How thankful I was on that day when the school announced that I could make a choice between Arts & Craft and Computer Science. How happy I was to be relived of the stitching and knitting business which other girls were glad and keen to work on!

With day ending with the last assembly as I sang in chorus the National Anthem “ Jana Gana Mana…..” reminding that patriotic vibes were pretty evident in me with all the goose bumps bursting on my skin as I ended the anthem with Jai Hind!

Rushing out from the school gates and forming groups to catch up the missed gossips, buying those ice candies and pineapple coated with Chilli powder and salt, and the taste of raw mangoes in the drizzle are now a thing of past.

As I sit to write this first blog I am tinted with the memories gushing at the same time on all the things I once did as kid , a little girl… those were the days of fun and frolic time has passed by leaps and bounds ………. Let me wind up and get back to some SERIOUS work for what I am paid for… Memories of School days still lingering in the backdrop I set on new task to design the next module for training.. .

Here I go Google….